As I wrote over on my other blog, I’m giving up my nearly 30 year quest for the perfect body.  I haven’t attained it yet and I doubt at this late point I’m going to.  I plan on staying healthy and active, but I’m going to do it in order to stay healthy and active, not to get skinny or get to some magical size that I think will make me happy.

That’s part of it really, I (actually many people) think that some outside thing is going to make them happy.  Some possession, some job, some man, some mythical number on a scale.  It’s not.  Happiness, true happiness, comes from within.  It comes from being satisfied with what you have, who you are and your place in the world.  I think many people come to that realization much earlier then I did, but I also think others never come to that realization.

I can’t get over how happy I am now.  I have a house that I absolutely love.  I love this place so much I find myself constantly cleaning up and doing things.  Hello!!! Me?????  It’s awesome.  I want to keep it looking as nice as possible because I love it so much.  I have a job that is just awesome.  I really love teaching and I’m sooooo looking forward to starting my second year.  I just know it’s going to be so much better than the first one.  I love my dogs.  We took in two scraggly looking dogs with lots of issues and they have turned into two of the best dogs ever.  Having a chance to spend the last 7 weeks with them has really helped them and me.  They have calmed down and really settled in and know what is expected of them.  While I have really gotten to know them.  I no longer try to put expectations on them based on previous dogs.  I know exactly who they are and I absolutely adore them for it.  I love my birds.  I have the privilege of caring for 10 birds, each with it’s own unique personality and quirks.  It’s a joy to have them around, listen to them talk and know they are happy and healthy. I love my husband.  I know he has a lot of faults but so do I.  We get along really well – most of the time – and are generally insync about things.  He is awesome about working his butt off to make sure we have money and can live in this awesome house.

Some people might say my life is perfect.  It’s not.  We have some financial problems, but nothing major.  We have our disagreements and issues, but nothing major.  I am incredibly blessed and need to remember that all the time.  So from now on I focus on the awesome things in my life and not the one thing that’s not perfect – my body.  I am done fighting with myself.

This is a Sponsored Post written by me on behalf of Coldwell Banker. All opinions are 100% mine.

As you may know, we recently purchased our first home. Now homeownership has a lot of drawbacks, the main one being that you can not just pick up the phone and call the landlord when something goes wrong. You have to take care of it yourself. However, the good far outweighs the bad and just knowing this house is mine makes me feel warm and fuzzy every single day.

I am one of those strange people that never wanted to own a house. I was a real estate appraiser for 10 years and still never wanted to own a house. But we were getting killed by taxes every year. Killed!!! But I honestly did not know if we would ever be able to afford to buy a house. We worked hard, payed a boatload of taxes and never seemed able to get ahead. How could we possibly come up with $40,000 for a down payment? It just did not seem likely.

Then two things happened. The sub-prime real estate market collapsed which caused the highly inflated prices to drop rapidly which means we were not priced out of the home market anymore. Also, the government put in the 2010 Homebuyer Tax Credits. This tax credit allowed first time homebuyers, or those who have not owned a home in three years, to claim a credit of $8,000 off their taxes. It also allowed current homeowners who have lived in their homes 5 of the last 8 years a $6,500 tax credit if they bought a new home. The income limits were very generous too; $125,000 for singles and $225,000 for couples. This was an opportunity we could just not pass up.

With the decrease in home prices, interest rates at the lowest they’ve been in years, and the $8,000 tax credit we literally could not afford not to buy. Also, the federal government allowed you to take the credit on 2009 taxes if you closed in 2010. We just got our taxes done and we applied the $8,000 credit to the 2009 taxes. This worked out fabulously for us because in order to afford the down we had to cash in a couple of 401ks. Cashing those in early generally come with hefty penalties, but because we had the $8,000 credit it offset the penalties. We are getting a huge – HUGE – chunk of change back. This is the first time we are getting a refund in easily 10 years. You have no idea how excited I am about it.

I believe that this tax credit expired already. I think you had to close by June 30, 2010 so that may not be around anymore – unless home sales plummet and the government brings it back which is always possible. But, we still have some of the greatest buying conditions in history. Prices are still relatively low, interest rates are down, and the regular tax benefits from owning a house are just too good to pass up. Next year, right off the top, we have about $12,000 in deductions so far – and there will be more before the year is up. So seriously, if you are even slightly considering buying a house, now is the time to jump on it. We did not think it was possible, we also did not think we’d find a house we liked! But after almost 2 years of looking on and off again we found the absolutely perfect house for us. I love this house and I say so every single day. So check it out. Start a search, see what’s out there, I think you will be surprised at what is possible.

Doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results.  I can be like that sometimes.  Especially if a habit or action worked for me at some point but has stopped working, I will continue to do it expecting it to work again even though it’s not working and I know it’s never going to work again.  I keep doing it until something hits me in the face – hey!! it’s not working….

Anyway, I’m feeling that way about a couple of things in my life.  There is one particular item that is controlled by others and I just participate in.  The powers that be keep bringing things up – different things, yet nothing ever seems to change.  I’m beginning to wonder if it’s time to let it go.  Also, with this group, there’s a lot of talk but seemingly little action and that irritates the hell out of me.  Don’t tell me what you’re going to do and never do it…. just do something and surprise me….I know people are busy, with the economy the way it is everyone is busy watching their money and trying to make a buck.  Even more reason to just put up and shut up….don’t get people’s hopes up then nothing happens…..seriously.

In other news, one more week and then school starts again.  Yikes!! I can’t believe summer vacation passed by so quickly.  I did get a lot done but I wish I’d gotten more…. Oh well, water – bridge, etc….. Okay, I’m off to do something constructive and stop all the bitching

Where is live is a private street, driveway really, with just three houses on it.  We are the middle house.   We have the largest lot and really, the best location.  We have a carport, a space next to the carport where my husband parks, and space in front to park.  The neighbor to one side is at the end of the drive so she has lots of places to park.  The neighbor on the other side, not so much.  They have very limited room for parking because they are at the bottom of the driveway.  They also went and fenced in their yard completely for the dogs and now have even less room to park.  When they were moving in and working on the house we let them park in front of our house because a lot of people where in and out.  Now they seem to think they can park their any time they want to.  It’s kind of pissing me off.  I think it’s very rude and inconsiderate to park in someone else’s place without asking – which they repeatedly do.  They really should have considered the parking situation before they bought the place.

I’m on summer break and I decided to really make it a summer break. I have things to do, write a thesis – write new lesson plans,  but I also decided to have some fun.  I have never, in my adult life, had the summer off.  I have never had a large block of time off and got paid for it.  I want to enjoy it so I’m refreshed  when I go back to school.  So yesterday I headed out to the beach.  My intention was to go for a swim to get some exercise. I did swim and it was awesome. After I swam I sat there and was just enjoying the view.  At that moment I decided that I would spend more time at the beach this summer.  I would get a sand chair and bring my book and just relax.  So I did that today.  It was a glorious day.  The sand was glinting gold.  The ocean was various shades of blue.  The sky was blue with big white puffy clouds.  Absolutely gorgeous.  And I could not relax.  I read for a few minutes but quickly grew bored.  I watched the scenery but found my mind thinking of things I needed to do when I got home.  It was crazy.  I just could not really relax and enjoy the moment.  I used to be able to do that.  I used to be able to shake everything off and just enjoy.  I realize that I may have been a little too good at it and shook off things I shouldn’t have, but I knew how to have fun.  I seem to have lost that ability.  Somehow,in my recent entry into grown-up activities ,  I lost the ability to really relax.  Wow!!!  That is so not good.

The house next door has been sold, they close on Tuesday.  The new owners have been here all week fixing it up before they move in.  They need to move and then are getting married 4th of July.  So things are pretty hectic for them right now.  I understand how crazy things can get.  But a couple of things.  They haven’t even really been in the house all that much and they are making all these changes to it.  I don’t understand.  They are talking about putting travertine tiles in the kitchen.  First, it’s not the kind of house or neighborhood that calls for travertine.  Second, travertine is expensive – what if you don’t like it???  Since they haven’t lived here and gotten a real feel for the place how can they know what will work?  I was here 3 months before I decided that I did want to get some laminate flooring for the bird room.  I don’t know, I guess that’s just not how I work so I don’t completely understand it.  I just don’t see the point in doing a lot of expensive work to a relatively cheap house.

Also, the female can talk.  Holy crap, can she talk….I mean I’m exhausted after spending 5 minutes with her. She is all over the map, can’t hold the thread of a conversation, and just doesn’t allow you to get a word in edgewise. Yikes… Oh well, to each his own.  They are not exactly the type we’ll be hanging with all the time anyway.  They are nice and we do get along so that’s good….

2 weeks from tonight I’ll be coming home from the end of school party. School would be over. My first year as a teacher will be in the books. Wow!! I really can not believe it. I learned so much and have such great ideas for next year. It’s been a wild ride and I can’t wait to do it again now that I know what I’m doing.

Something I realized today is that apparently I’m happy. I am the person who always, always checked the want ads. For all the years I can remember I would check the want ads every weekend to see what jobs are out there. I would always look. It was if I was always looking for something better. I would always imagine a better job, better house, etc. However this past year I haven’t looked at the want ads once. I hadn’t even thought about it. I did look tonight only because I heard the other teachers talking about how they have summer teaching jobs. We get paid through the summer but a job would be a great way to bring in some extra money. So tonight I looked and that’s when it hit me how I haven’t been doing that.

I absolutely love the new house and can not imagine living anywhere else. In just 2 short months I feel more at home here then I have any where we’ve lived. I love it. So it looks like I might finally be happy. Wow!! Who knew!!!

Now that the site is up and working and all is right with the world, let’s get back to our regular blogging nonsense. The end of the school year is almost here and you have no idea how much I’m looking forward to it. To be incredibly honest, a small part of the reason I got into teaching was the breaks – trust me, it is a very small reason and there are so many much more important reasons – but it’s true it’s there. I realize now that those breaks are really, really needed. Teaching is hard, draining work, and you need those breaks to recharge. So I’m looking forward to 6 weeks off. I have 2 main goals during those 6 weeks.

First, I will finish my thesis in it’s entirety. I am going to work up a schedule for my days and I’m going to devote 3-4 hours each day to the thesis. That amounts to about 126 – 168 hours of work on it. Since I’m not doing research this should be more then sufficient to write a really good paper. I love my topic and I love the methods I’m using so I don’t think it will be a problem doing it. If I can I’ll spend more time on it. I will be attending the class where you actually write the thesis. I’m not registered so I won’t actually be a member of the class, but I’ve spoken to the instructor and it’s okay if I go. That will be 5-6 hours a week extra. Yeah!!! I will have my thesis done by August 1st.

Second, I am going to become one of those weight loss success stories. I am going to workout everyday and really work on getting in shape. This process will be detailed over at Cake. I really want to run and do triathlons again and I need to lose a little weight to get started. My goal is to start running again June 1. Yes, it was May 1st but due to being sick almost the entire month of April, I’ve pushed it back a little. I also want to buy a treadmill, but not just any treadmill. I want a Nordic Track Incline Trainer with iFitLive. I have decided that when I lose 15lbs I can buy myself one. I have posters all over the house with a picture of the treadmill and the words “15 lbs” above it. Every room I walk into I see that. I even have one posted on the refrigerator and what great motivation that is.

Third, I want to work with Axl and Lola. Since I will be home most of the day, I want to spend some time training them to do various things. I also want to spend time working on the walk with them. They are getting a lot better but there is still lots of room for improvement.

Finally, there is soooo much work to be done on the house. I want to get some more painting done. I want to get my workout room organized. I would really like to get the bird room painted – but that involves moving all the birds out for a couple of days, so it is a major undertaking. I want to do something with the kitchen cabinets and there’s a ton of other little things that need to be done. Hubby will be building a deck and putting a sliding glass door in the workout room. So overall it will be a pretty busy 6 weeks.

So that is what I plan to do on my summer vacation. How about you???

I started writing my last post with a very specific point in mind and then I got all caught up in what happened and forgot to make my point. Which was, while my blog was down I spent some time thinking about how much time and energy I wanted to put into getting it back up again. At one point it was thought I would have to download the database, uninstall WP, reinstall the new version of WP, upload the database and hope that nothing got lost in translation. Now to many, many people that may not seem like a big deal. And while I am extremely proficient with computers – I hate them!!! I hate having to learn anything new!! I hate having to take multiple steps to do one thing!! As much as I love computers, I hate them just as much. So the thought of having to figure out how to backup the database and store it on my hard drive – so it didn’t get erased by mistake – and then redo WP and then reinstall it…..Ugh!!! It would have taken me time to figure all this out and then do it and worry and pray that I was doing everything right…. I would probably be taking herbal phentermine like it was candy…. So this led to some serious thoughts about why I blog and do I want to continue…..

I started my first blog for me and for the longest time I didn’t get any comments and I was fine with that. I wasn’t sure I wanted anyone reading what I wrote anyway. Then I started reading a lot of other blogs and leaving comments on them. Then they started coming to my blog and leaving comments. Before you knew it there was this large blogging community I was a part of and it was kind of cool. We had common interests, namely running and triathlons, and it was fun to be part of such a large, extended family. Then I started this blog as place to write about things other then training and health. I also started a pet blog because the number of animals in the house quickly overtook the number of humans…if they ever ban together we are in trouble…and I became involved in different communities with each blog. It was fun and I really enjoyed it. I would read other blogs, comment, drop Entrecards, and post on my blogs. Then I started graduate school…and starting teaching high school…and adopted two rescue dogs…..and suddenly I had zero time for the computer and truly, was far too busy living my life to write about it. I have managed to strike a balance between blogging and living and it seems to be working, but when my blog went down it really got me to thinking.. do I still want to continue doing this???? I think at this point I do… very soon my life will be slowing down some – graduate school is almost done and that dreaded first year of teaching is over – and I will have some more free time again…So I’ll keep going for now and see what happens…but the thought is now planted….

I have a bad habit of always looking forward. I think that one reason I love walking my dogs so much is because they live so much in the moment that it forces me to do the same. And that is something I rarely do. So we are rapidly approaching the end of the semester and I keep thinking, when the semester ends I’ll do this, when the semester ends I’ll do that, etc….. I have to stop doing that…..

I have to go to the dentist and I don’t want to. I have a tooth that is really giving me trouble and there is no way around it, I have to go to the dentist. Ugh…..I really, really hate the dentist……

I’ve ordered some books to train the dogs. I’m going to become the next dog whisperer

I want to send out announcements about our new house and address. Maybe I should get some photo cards with a picture of the house on front….That would be cute…….

I’m exhausted….I guess I should go to bed….